soundtrack: g. love and special sauce: this ain't living
ok. i'm back. i don't think i'm going to do anything today (like i ever do anything on sunday...). actually, i was going to go to my aunt's place for a surprise birthday party for twin cousins of mine. at first, i really wanted to go... i even tried to convince the brothers to come with me.. but then i realized that us cousins never talk to each other. the twins, To and F, don't really keep in contact with me. F and i get along fine (i guess because we're just similar people), while To, i still think, hates my guts. i really don't know why; he was the one that would constantly beat me up when we used to live in ny. maybe some of it is the age gap; about ten years apart. but i think it's something else. there's just no feeling of closeness or family. they're strangers.
it's almost the same with the baltimore cousins. it's sad because they were about 20 minutes away from school and they would never visit me. i used to call them, but they never called me back. i grew tired of calling and then they would complain that i would never call. the saddest thing is that we were really close when they used to live in kenya; you couldn't separate us. now that they have a taste of america, some are alcoholics, some have unexpected children... it's wild because they expect me to be just as wild as them. and it's sad because they think that; they really don't know who i am.
but i do have some good cousins; two sets of them. one of them goes to umbc now... we kind of faded off for awhile since our parents had some sort of tiff, but it's like we never stopped talking. it's great. the other set, sisters: one goes to cp and the other lives and works in ny. we won't talk for months, but put us in a room and we're talking like old times. it's kinda sad because they're my distant cousins and my direct cousins are the ones so far away...
ehh. i don't know why i'm talking about family today. one of my aunts (of baltimore cousins fame) came to visit this weekend. the parents just left to bmore to drop her back and 20 minutes later, here comes a baltimore cousin wondering what's going on. oh, that's crap. i'm avoiding the upstairs.
anyways. maybe i'll catch a movie today (dirtyprettythings?). hanging out with nic tomorrow. ooh, got a check from a couple from church this weekend when they found out that i graduated... how wild is that? i got some money to spend.
peace.
ok. i'm back. i don't think i'm going to do anything today (like i ever do anything on sunday...). actually, i was going to go to my aunt's place for a surprise birthday party for twin cousins of mine. at first, i really wanted to go... i even tried to convince the brothers to come with me.. but then i realized that us cousins never talk to each other. the twins, To and F, don't really keep in contact with me. F and i get along fine (i guess because we're just similar people), while To, i still think, hates my guts. i really don't know why; he was the one that would constantly beat me up when we used to live in ny. maybe some of it is the age gap; about ten years apart. but i think it's something else. there's just no feeling of closeness or family. they're strangers.
it's almost the same with the baltimore cousins. it's sad because they were about 20 minutes away from school and they would never visit me. i used to call them, but they never called me back. i grew tired of calling and then they would complain that i would never call. the saddest thing is that we were really close when they used to live in kenya; you couldn't separate us. now that they have a taste of america, some are alcoholics, some have unexpected children... it's wild because they expect me to be just as wild as them. and it's sad because they think that; they really don't know who i am.
but i do have some good cousins; two sets of them. one of them goes to umbc now... we kind of faded off for awhile since our parents had some sort of tiff, but it's like we never stopped talking. it's great. the other set, sisters: one goes to cp and the other lives and works in ny. we won't talk for months, but put us in a room and we're talking like old times. it's kinda sad because they're my distant cousins and my direct cousins are the ones so far away...
ehh. i don't know why i'm talking about family today. one of my aunts (of baltimore cousins fame) came to visit this weekend. the parents just left to bmore to drop her back and 20 minutes later, here comes a baltimore cousin wondering what's going on. oh, that's crap. i'm avoiding the upstairs.
anyways. maybe i'll catch a movie today (dirtyprettythings?). hanging out with nic tomorrow. ooh, got a check from a couple from church this weekend when they found out that i graduated... how wild is that? i got some money to spend.
peace.
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