soundtrak: gorillaz: rock the house

you know, i love my family, i really do. but my uncle really just gets on my last nerve. really. so i come back from this conference and there he is; he's been here all weekend. he's still here today and i don't know when he's going to leave. all i know is that he's gots to go!

ok, i got that off my chest. so, this conference... i underestimated it. yes, we were up in the boondocks, but they actually had internet access (never leave home without it). i wish i brought my camera to take pics. it was very nice up there. my head is crammed with science. saw some people from umbc. i also found out that scientists have a very strange sense of humor.
oh. the best part was meeting watson... you know, of watson and crick fame. he talked for about 15 or so. but just to get a glimpse of what it was like at that time; science was so different compared to now. that was cool.

got back around 9 yesterday. promptly called T and watched an hour of 'are you being served?' today, i went to work and tried to find out when i would be signing up for my classes. ended up going to gtown and getting myself into the system, in turn, signing up for classes. i'm so excited you guys... school rocks! i have to do some more administrative stuff tomorrow; maybe have lunch with naj before she leaves.

sorry that my sentences are choppy. i don't feel so good. nauseated. it's time for the pills. hmm. anyways, more later i suppose.

peace.

edit: updated lists on right.

soundtrak: amon tobin: stoney street

as of late, i've just been tired. working and working and making some decisions. i really haven't had time to do anything, let alone write here, call/email people back, balance my checkbook, clean my room, etc.
so it looks like i'll be starting classes at gtown the beginning of september. yay for me. and i'll also be working part time in the lab; double yay for the money. i feel calmer now that things are settled and stuff is being set into motion.
i'll be away (from D.O.G) for awhile i think: going to this conference for a week and then signing up for classes and getting started. i haven't been really looking, but a laptop i must buy.
and this daggone navigation bar; you can't see my title. but i guess i've had this skin for too long anyways. it's time for a change. maybe soon.

goodnight and talk to you guys later.

peace.

(please feel free to leave comments in comments or guestbook, drop an email or IM me)

soundtrak: the walkmen: we've been had

this song comes from an album titled everyone who pretended to like me is gone. yes, that's how crappy i feel right now.

too many things going wrong and i have to make desisions now. and i can't. i can't think. i don't know what to do. but a choice has to be made. mom isn't helping me. dad never helps (or cares, it seems).

i can't write right now. more later.


peace.

soundtrak: vikter duplaix: how do i move (spacek)

so i guess what they say is true: dc goes on vacation in august. because of this time honored ritual, i am still waiting patiently to hear. still. waiting... i'm not a patient person.

yesterday, after i came back from a long day of work, i was getting ready to go back to church (it's a record; 5 days in a week) to practice for special music, when my phone rang. the last time i emailed Y, i told him that he should call, but to surprise me. i have to give it to him; calling at 7pm was a surprise. we talked about work and school and how everybody thinks he's an academic when in fact he only takes classes out of boredom. we talked about the current job market for engineers and scientists. you know, the stuff that you would talk about if your mother was in earshot. unfortunately, our conversation didn't last very long. the brother is like an onion; he's hard to peel...damn the layers.

this week is dre's last week here. he'll be going off to graduate school in bmore. it's funny because i usually don't have the time to eat lunch with the crew, but in the afternoons, i find him out there reading papers and trying to pass the time. tuesday, we talked for a bit. he now knows i'm (was) an avid trekkie, my hypothesis on the chronic techno beat, how i got started listening to house and my 'leaving nih' song (lovingly to the tune of the mickey mouse club goodbye song). 'you didn't know i was that crazy,' i laughed. we laughed. he's a cool guy. despite his coolness, he aggravates me. i don't know how to explain it, but it's like i'm hot and cold. it's bad.

i'm on amazon right now. my hand is itching to press the 'checkout' button so bad... so bad y'all. isn't this one of the first warning signs that you'll be in credit card debt or something. i really don't need the cds/books, but i want them so bad... so so bad... i'm gonna see if i have some extra $$. maybe...

MT is whistling right now... he knows it aggravates me to no end. bastard. anyways, we're on speaking terms again, which happened just after i finished posting my last entry. i don't know if it's a blessing or a curse: i can't stay angry for long. as for holding a grude, that's a different matter.

anyways... is this week over yet?

peace.

soundtrak: zero 7: give it away

time is winding down for me. working on my poster for the conference at the end of the month and still waiting to hear from gtown. i sort of got somewhat good news last friday, but i really don't want to go into it. depsite the good, i'm still kinda upset about it. i'm just waiting for more clarification.

MT did something bad friday. with all the jokes that we play on each other, we unverbally agreed that we would never mess with our work; our experiments. i was running a western on friday and i used the wrong secondary antibody. it was mostly my fault because i didn't even bother to look at the label. MT came over looking in my ice bucket (he was running westerns that day too). he looked at the bottle, looked at me, then put the bottle back. i asked him what was up, but he said nothing. an hour and 1/2 later, when my blot didn't come out, i ran into him coming back. 'oh, it was probably because you used the wrong secondary antibody.' 'how do you know?' i asked him and then i remembered. he smiled. i was pissed for the rest of the afternoon because i knew he did that on purpose; he committed the unpardonable. my whole day was wasted. he just came in about 10 min. ago. i'm just saying anything to him right now. but i'm too nice of a person.

this weekend i was just in a mood. i hate when people tell me to smile. why? i can do whatever the hell i want and if i don't want to smile, i don't have to. it doesn't mean that i'm sad or depressed; hell, i just don't want to smile, ok?
had to sing saturday (haven't sung in awhile and i really didn't feel like singing that day), deal with my uncle for lunch and then had meetings on sunday morning. i'm just not feeling church right now (and by that, i don't mean not feeling God). people just acting shady. have meetings today and tomorrow. *sigh*

sunday, naj and i went downtown to go see the village. lot of people said it was bad, but i think it was good; people expected it to be one way, but not the way it turned out to be. something unexpected, but i don't want to ruin it for anybody. after, we ate at chipole's and were accosted by extremely bad pick up lines. it was cool that we got to hang out; naj is leaving for seattle for a couple of weeks before she comes back.

man, i don't know. i feel lonely today, but i want to be by myself. the lunch crew is out eating lunch (i can hear them), but i don't want to go out. crispy hasn't called me back, T never calls me back and i refuse to call bqq back ever again.
well, T is pissing me off because he says that i should get out of the house, but he never invites me anywhere. he hangs with other people. i don't even know why this is bothering me, but it is. but he's better than most people; he does call to check up on me when he's not busy. that whole thing that happened about a month ago; he called back and apologized for not making it. i was still pissed.

talking about being pissed, my fam is pissing me off right now too. al is just ... i don't know. but he's leaving for school soon and i ain't sad to see him go right now. my uncle is forever pissing me off, but i know he can't help being old school. he's finally going back to kenya next week, so of course, we're having a BBQ next weekend. yay. more relatives that i don't want to see.

so alot of people that know me and know about D.O.G wonder why i write under a pseduonym (well, it's not really a fake name; people call me chi all the time). i have alot of friends (mostly from school) that don't. well, for one, i'm not trying to get fired or anything like that. but i think it's somewhat my family (but not al and timon, who pretty much don't care about what i do), who if they found out about this hobby would have a fit. most of my family believes that everything should be kept to one's self, especially your problems. but i know this was big problem for me when i was depressed; i never told anybody i was. and well, there's the control too. i can control (somewhat) who knows who i am on the real. i feel like i can express myself more without having to think about who is reading this and why. of course, some others are more free, but i'm just not at that point yet. i don't know. maybe someday.

ok. incubation time is over. back to work.

peace.

soundtrak: thomas mapfumo: madhebhura

the sunday morning list (aka first of the month list):

- it's thunderstorming outside. naj hasn't called me yet, so i don't know if we're going downown to see the village or not.
- so i was walking to the metro with MT on friday (i left late and i took the train that day), and he was talking about his weekend plans with, lo and behold, his girlfriend. i wasn't shocked or anything like that. whatever; it rolls off my back. i think at work, i'm the odd man out.
- M emailed me this weekend. i don't know how she found out that i was trying to get into gtown, but she did. i don't know what to say to her; everything is a competion to her. i just got tired of playing.
- this song is the bomb *chi dances in seat*
- did you know that b. obama and are from the same tribe. kenya represent!
- talking about school, i keep on checking my email four times daily. like they're going to email me during the weekend... they're probably going to send a letter... i should probably check the mail...
- in the event that i do get into school, i'm looking at cars, computers and places to live... not all in that order (dc locals, anybody have any suggestions?). i do have money saved up, but i'm hesitant about spending it. i want a nest egg for post graduate life. also looking at paying off my small undergraduate loans (which i shouldn't even be paying off, but i don't even want to start on that subject...)
- despite all this money that i'll eventually have to spend, i'm still interesting in getting a domain, a place of my own. i don't know if that's going to be feasible, with lack of time and money.
- you know what? screw bbq. there is no point trying to talk to him. he knows i'm upset with him and apparently that's not bothering him because he hasn't bothered to call me. i don't know even know why i get all worked up. it's not giving up, but resigning to the whole situation. it's done and i will think about it no more.

hope you're having a good weekend.

peace.