soundtrak: bent: strictly bongo

it's sunday morning and i'm in lab. my id never works off- hours and basically i have to wait until somebody comes around to get into my area. either that or call campus police (and they suck because they always take their sweet time.. like i don't have experiments to run). this morning i was lucky; one of the postdocs from the lab down the hall was coming in just as i was walking in. actually, she's a doctor (she got her MD in another country) and is working on exams so she can do her residency. two things surprise me about working in this particular institute: 1. most everybody are MDs. of course, there are PhDs (the postdocs), but alot of the mentors are MDs, as well as the section chief. 2. alot of people are using their time here as a jumping board to medical school. even the other student in my lab (undergraduate fellow, which i was before i started at GU), is studying for his MCAT... and let me tell you, they all hate lab work. they don't like that it's tedious and that sometimes it doesn't work. of course i don't like it when my experiments don't work, but i don't know: i love to do bench work. people seem genuinely surprised when i say this. i can't imagine doing anything else. a long time in high school, i dreamed of working in this very institute, working on my PhD, and here i am. it seems so incredible.

anyways, i'm almost done here and then i gotta go home and get ready for my cousin's engagement party. in true kenyan/ugandan/african fashion, the male (my cousin) introduces his family to his fiance's family. i'm lucky; i just gotta stand and look pretty. al has to help my cousin 'barter' a good price for his fiance. i've never really been to one of these things, so it'll be interesting to see how it all goes.

it was funny; yesterday, mom, my brothers and i were having lunch with one of the kenyan families from our church as well as some of their guests from zimbabwae. lunch discussion ended up on arranged marriages and you know that everybody ended up looking at me for some reason. i'm 26 and still very much single. i don't mind it all that much (sometimes) and the thought of being 'put together' turns me off so quickly...

anyways, i could go on, but incubation is over and so is this entry.

peace.

soundtrak: the clash: rock the cashbah

back to maryland list:

- i came back from florida last night. actually, the flight landed early, but we were stuck on the runway and then getting our luggage (my friends and i)... the guy checking me in orlando kept on calling me 'sweetheart'; you know i would of had to correct him if he wasn't cute. you thought he would have hooked me up instead of having to wait for my suitcase...
- this trip has given me a new appreciation of 80s music; oh, how i've missed you so. i love this song (see soundtrak).
- actually, i should have taken a day off so i could straighten my room and prepare for the week properly, but i didn't. i'm kind of glad that i'm back at work. i'm ready to get back to work.
- i can't help it: i'm a neat freak. things have a place for a reason and i expect things to be that way. i know people have been using my bench/desk and family using my things while i've been away, but dag people! i'm trying not to spazz out too much. but i have to rearrange things back to the way i like it.
- after finishing setting up the experiments i'm doing this week, i went to go visit the scientist that i worked with in high school, as well as his lab; he helped me when i applied to UMBC and Georgetown and has just been a great person to come for advice. i just happen to work in the same building, so i just dropped by real quick. it's amazing when you start and then you see how much things have grown. he's acting director in his institute now. i'm amazed and in awe.
- now that i'm back, i need to make lists (that's the only way things get done, i'm telling you). i need to make a food list, a work/school list, a personal list (mine eyes only)... many lists... now, if i only had the time...
- keepin' it real moment: i don't think i look all that attractive (hey, i'm keepin' it real), so i was really surprised when i caught some guy's eye walking to my gate yesterday. i don't know; i'm sort of just like 'move it along'. maybe i am clueless; terminally oblivious.
- i'm really trying hard to come out of shell (hence the keepin' it real moments). i know that i keep to myself alot, especially my thoughts and feelings. you would think that i would express them on my blog, but i don't. out of sight, out of mind. but in 2006 (which i have dubbed the year of chi: the year of me), i gotta take some chances, i gotta take some risks.
- despite this new chi, i did not talk to the guy sitting next to me on the plane (more like sitting on top of me... haven't people heard of personal space...).

peace.

the vacation entry:

tuesday (18 july)

soundtrak: milosh: you make me feel

- florida is not as hot as everywhere else in the country, including home (dc). it rains everyday, sometime around 2pm
- orlando (kissimmee) is about 60 miles away from the kennedy space center.
when the shuttle landed this monday, we heard two loud booms that rattled the windows. we didn't realize those were the rockets from the shuttle landing. very cool indeed (i'm such a science geek).
- this vacation i'm trying to do things that i normally don't have time to do while working, including reading books, watching movies (at least
guilt-free) and working out. oh, and writing. (no internet though, which is
rough)
- oh, the whole airport things as well as my first flight in 5 years wasn't all that bad; of course being said after the fact. i really hate sitting at the back of the plane, especially with takeoff. sitting there, grasping the chair arms, i realized that i would have to get used to flying all over again.
- recovering from having saturday night plans pulled out from under me, i went out with Y and some church friends of mine. i really didn't have to pull teeth with Y, being that his (new? other? current?) girlfriend is out of town and boredom was probably setting in. i have realized that i am the 'safe friend'; girlfriends have no need to worry about me. anyways, the outing was pretty good; it was good talking to Y again.

wednesday (19 july)

soundtrak: london elektricity: remember the future

- nic called me today. her and beau are pregnant! i'm gonna be an auntie!
i'm so excited and i'm not even having the baby.
- didn't really do anything today. worked out, kinda lazied around. this is the life.

friday (21 july)

soundtrak: silence

- went to tampa/clearwater today, to the beach. it was nice, but too hot. i didn't get in the water; chi doesn't do ocean/animals in the ocean. that's just the way it is.
- i'm so bad when i go places; i never take pictures. i just activated the picture service on my phone and i'm going to do it that way instead.






























- since there's no real place i can access the internet, i've been using my phone to check my mail email, it's a pain in the butt, but i'm going through withdrawal.

saturday (22 july)

soundtrak: silence

- went to go visit another church friend that just moved down to florida. we went to church with her and hung out for a bit...
- driving back to orlando, we took a detour downtown:
















sunday (23 july)

soundtrak: mingle

- checked out this morning and went souvenir shopping. i got 'diva' glasses for myself (i kept on shouting, "where is my sparkling water! chilled, no
ice!")

















- i actually picked my seat when i booked my return flight, so i was grateful to sit in front of the wings (while my friends sat at the very back). it made the flight more enjoyable for me and i got to enjoy the scenery. i wish i could take pictures (no cell phones) espcially since i've never flown in/out of bwi before.
- i'm craving my bed. i'm ready to go home.


peace.

soundtrak: london elektricity: do you believe

new radio.blog up; all new... well, to me at least. do you believe is my new favorite.

presentation one was this morning. other than the fact that i got dry mouth and rushed a bit, it went fine. people were impressed, which i guess, was the first impression i was going for. my second one is tomorrow afternoon. i'm too tired to think about it now. work is a trip right now, let me tell you. too much stuff to do and not enough time to do it in a 14 hour day (yes, 14 hour day)

rather impromptu of me, i emailed a bunch of college friends that i haven't seen in awhile to see if they wanted to get together saturday night before i leave for florida sunday afternoon. well, let me not get into it, lest be i sound too childish. let's just say something else was planned...without me. i'm not amused, not amused.

anyways, enough for now. more before i leave maybe.

peace.

soundtrak: gnarls barkley: st. elsewhere

sunday's list:

- how do you start a list...
- i just came back from cleaning houses in baltimore. i wish my day was over, but it's not. i have to meet with the new youth leader today to discuss the youth ministry at my church. i just couldn't do it for another two years (be youth leader); there's just too much on my plate.
- talking about too much on a plate, this week i have two major presentations (back to back!) and a massive experiment. i'm meeting with dr. A on tuesday to go over slides for both presentations. for one presentation, i'm scared about. i picked a scientific paper to present and one of the head honchos over there is excited about it, so he'll definitely be there. pray for a sista. i figure that if i bomb both presentations, i can cry all next week in florida.
- that's right, i'm going to florida. like i didn't need a vacation already and then this week popped up. kinda nervous about flying (i haven't flown since summer 2001; pre-9/11), but i'm trying to get over it. trying.
- oooh, world cup is on...

anyways, things to do. i'm gone. have a great week.

peace.

soundtrak: ian pooley: intro (from souvenirs)

the random list:

- for the first time in a long time, i've actually had a good week. experiments working well, sleeping ok (i never sleep well), etc. i have a deadline at the end of the month, only to be interrupted by a week long vacation to florida. yes, i'm going on vacation; it's sad when your mom and your boss push you to go on vacation.
- i rarely have dreams, but when i do, they are rather strange indeed. and it's usually because i eat right before i go to sleep, but i have gotten out of that habit. these past couple of weeks, i've been having strange lingering dreams about a particular person (not bbq). it's been disrupting, trying to figure out what my subconscious is trying to tell me. in a way, i don't want to find out. it's been bothering me.
- speak of satan (the catalysts would say that instead of 'speak of the devil' all the time), i received a random email from, of all people, bbq, which brought up alot of stuff that i didn't want to deal with at the time. trying to figure if i should call him up or not, he beat me to the punch and called me last week, in lab. it just disturbed me; the daytime minutes, the call itself, the conversation itself. i'll spare you the details, but under the surface it seems we clash over the issues dealing with real life vs. phd work (he quit, i'm still in it). i wish he would just get married and get it over with (will he ever find 'the one'?), stop bothering me.
- but really. i don't know if it really bothers me that i have no life. i didn't have one before i started this program. i know i'm introverted; it's my nature. if you google my real name, i'm sure you'll find the program i participated as a young teen to help to build my self-esteem. it did help to draw me out a bit, but like they say... well, i forget what 'they' say, but my self-esteem isn't all up there and i'm still rather introverted, with bursts of extrovertedness. i'm self conscious most of the time really. i don't really like the way i look, my voice is too strange, my actions too childish, my work is never good enough. it's always never good enough, it seems. so it's easier, rather to interact with people, to just bury my head in the sand, in my work. i'm trying to be better, get out more, but it's a process and sometimes i fall behind.
- the space shuttle took off today. for me, it's still breathtaking, to see something man made go up into space. maybe i'm just nerdy, but watching the launch today: it was spectacular.
- i miss college. i miss talking to people and interacting and building relationships. i'm not saying that you can't do that in the real world, but it's different in college. timon, who's leaving for university in august, asked me about it the other day and i just started thinking about it all. and the people. friends that you thought you would never stop talking to are long gone and the ones that you thought you could do without are talking to you everyday. it's weird. odd. i miss alot of them now.
- it feels like something's missing (other than a life... ha!). i can't really explain it. i wish i could, so i could find it already. it's annoying as hell.

i would write more (there is always more to write), but sleep awaits me.

peace.